“When you really want something, you will find a way. When you don’t really want something, you’ll find an excuse.”Rachel Hollis, Girl Wash Your Face
I have always wanted to create my own business, but I always found a reason not to. While I was still working full-time my reason was that I worked all week and wanted my weekends to be spent with my family or traveling to see Marek. Before I got married my excuse was that I wanted to enjoy a break from work because I was seriously burnt out.
However, while in quarantine I found myself creating a logo for my business, and then I purchased a domain and started creating a WordPress site. It kept me distracted from the fact that there was a pandemic, that my fiancé was deployed and that our wedding was only three months away. But I found a lot of joy in designing my site and content for it. When Marek returned from deployment, I showed him my website. He looked at me and told me to go for it. I started listing all the reasons why I shouldn’t.
“What if I have no clients?” “What if I fail?” He looked at me and told me how creative I was and that I wasn’t going to fail. I told him that he had to say that because he was my almost husband. He just smiled at me and told me to publish my site.
So, I did. I launched my site and Instagram in early June. I wasn’t planning on posting content or taking on clients until after the wedding. After the wedding I posted my first blog post. Family and friends immediately shared it on their social media platforms. I was so happy but there was also doubt in the back of my mind. But I stuck with it. And before I knew it several people reached out. Some of them I knew personally, and others were referred to me by friends. I am so grateful for all my clients and family/friends who support my dreams and business.
However, I do still find myself doubting my dreams sometimes. There are days when I miss working in non-profit but there are other joy filled days where I spent hours drinking coffee and creating things. There are days where I miss being in an office but others where I feel blessed that I get to control my schedule. I miss having co-workers but am grateful that I get to spend this time working from home with my husband while he attends virtual grad school.
I think there will always a small part of me that has doubts but I feel like that is natural. In a way the doubt has made me more passionate to succeed. It has also prompted me to trust in God. My relationship with God has gotten stronger along with my prayer life. The doubt although scary at times, makes me excited about the future and how I can grow and expand on my business.
My friends and family continue to support my dreams and help me find new avenues for my business.A close friend of mine recently asked me to design invitations for her. I thought to myself that is something else I can do. (Side note if need invitations or personalized stationery let me know!) I have also found myself listening to podcasts by other women who started out as bloggers and now have a podcast. I could see myself in the future having a podcast.
For now, I am happy and excited where I am, drinking my coffee and creating but can’t wait to see what the future holds.